VA providers are recommending me to go to a PTSD partial program; does anyone have any experience?

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Sorry if this is the wrong place to post this but I have a hard time relating to feedback from people outside the community and from what I have seen, this subreddit is pretty blunt (which is a good thing). I am part of the VA healthcare system, where I receive treatment for PTSD and chronic pain. The PTSD diagnosis is something I am very uncomfortable with as I believe that my experiences don’t rate and if the diagnosis is accurate than it feels like a weakness on my part. I was deployed as flight-crew on the gunships and while we did plenty of “combat” missions, we never had to shoot or were ever really in danger (outside of maintenance issues). The closest I got to enemy fire was a fluke mortar round that landed inside the wire on the other side of a t barrier a couple of hundred meters away. Even that experience was more a curiosity than anything, I remember thinking “huh, the alarm was actually on point this time”.

After getting out, I started having difficulties falling asleep but just chalked that do having a shitty sleep schedule while I was in. I also gradually started noticing that I became uncomfortable in crowed venues which came to a head when I was on a train and had like a minor panic attack. During my time within the VA I have been through A-Z for medications (the meds used for pain are often the same as depression) and have been through numerous different therapists incorporating CBT, DDT, etc. Throughout this I have been able to be remain functional by just throwing myself into work, often capping out on OT, but a recent procedure kind of forced me to stay still for an extended period.

This was a couple of months ago and while I have fully recovered, I have found it exceedingly difficult to get out of bed in the morning or just do basic self care. At this point, leaving the house is an accomplishment in of itself. As much as I try, I can’t seem to snap out of it. A couple of providers recommend going to a partial program and I was wondering if anyone has had any experience with them. From what I have seen online, opinions are pretty polarizing and the hospital environment is unsettlingly to me. At this point I don’t really know what else to do though. If anyone has any opinions or recommendations, I would really appreciate the input. Sorry for creating the Paradise Lost of whiny posts but I could use any help or input. I really don’t want to end up being smothered by a giant indian though.

TLDR: Been stuck in a rut for the last couple of months and providers recommending partial program, anyone have any experiences or other recommendations?

submitted by /u/insanethrowawayacct
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